According to the gov, we're leaving for Mississippi on Monday. Assuming we'll at least make it half-way this time, you won't be reading a blog from me for at least two weeks. We're scheduled to return on the June 3rd, so hopefully they don't push us back. I'm all for doing the tornado relief down south, but I also want to see Minnesota so hopefully I can do both. I'm still going to leave my laptop up in Iowa. Hopefully I won't go through withdraws or anything. My blood already itches from my multiple addictions to cocaine, heroine, crystal meth, and generic-brand cold medicines; and, of course I don't want my teeth to start itching from a Facebook addiction. Wish me luck.
Not having internet means more than not blogging (I know, I know, you're going to cry every night until I return), but it also means I can't demonstrate how fat I am through my pictures. Hopefully I'll actually be able to eat some new food down there, so when I return I'll flood your newsfood, oops I mean newsfeed (haha equally as satisfying) with lots of pictures.
I know I fail at titles because I keep explaining them, but whatever. Just like you can't get to the center of a blow pop without finishing off the tongue-tiring hard candy, the government is making me lick my way to Mississippi (doesn't quite sound right). Though it took some time, time that I'm not so mad I had to endure, hopefully Monday will mean I get to the center of the blow pop where I can chew the gum of Mississippi and aid the people down there. Blow three bubbles and wish me some luck. Help is on the way Mississippi!
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