Snacks for Thought

A good friend of mine called me the other day and it got me thinking. They were torn up over an issue they were having with their boyfriend. As important as the issue was for them, this isn't a gossip blog, so just forget I even mentioned that. The important point here is that relationships are a critical part of human life. How many of us are defined by the relationships we hold (or can't hold)? If you take the time to think, you'll probably realize that nearly everything about us is somehow glued to a relationship with other people. Whether it's family, friend, or romantic, our happy balloons seem to be inflated when relationships progress in a positive direction.

But most people know that, or at least have some level of understanding when it relates to relationships and happy balloons. But is this notion of happiness being tied into other people an okay thing? Disregard the difference between joy and happiness when thinking for this blog. Also keep in mind that I'm a single 24 year-old male, so I'm referring to people in a similar division. That means if you're married, or 3 years old, or both, then what I say may not apply to you. Allowing the height of our happy balloons to rise or fall depending on how outside relationships are going may or may not be an okay thing, but I propose a deeper look.

What I really took away from the conversation with my friend is stress. Stress equates to an excited porcupine that's trying it's hardest to show your happy balloon how special it's quills feel. Think about the last issue you had with a relationship, and how unhappy it made you feel, and then think about why? Was it something you did wrong? Something they did wrong? Either way, how much control did you have over the situation? I'd bet my eleventh toe that there came a point when you couldn't do anything more about the situation, but it still made you sad. Humans feel sad, it's understandable. That's why God created a guy to think of ice cream and hot dogs. But how sad should you be feeling? Unless you enjoy porcupines, you shouldn't be feeling very sad for very long. I'm sure you already did, but when a relationship goes sour, do everything you can to mend the situation (as appropriate), and then stop. Stop does not mean go in most languages, but this notion of stopping will probably be the hardest thing you have to do. By stop I mean stop stressing. Once you do all that you can do (which does not include more stressing), then that's exactly what it says. You can't do anymore, so by stressing all you are accomplishing is creating pain for yourself.

Of course it's easier said than done, but do it. Do what you can, eat a hot dog dipped in ice cream, breath some air into a balloon, and let the situation go. The rest is up to the other person, but if they are worth being hurt over, than they will be there no matter what. That means if they aren't worth being hurt over they'll leave...so let them go because they aren't worth it.